Slow Your Roll...Before You Roll Your Ankle
It’s beginning to get almost comical the number of times that the Universe has given me the message to “slow down” this year. As an air sign, first born, and fire constitution - I have no idea what “slow” means. My brain is forever moving at the speed of light and for some strange reason I must feel compelled to get my body to keep up. But here’s the thing - the Universe will get you to heed it’s messages one way or another.
This year has really been gearing up for me, much to my delight, after the last 2 years have been like crawling through the mud. Since moving back to Iowa, recovering from an abusive relationship, grieving 4 loved ones who transitioned, and entering menopause, well…I sorta crawled into my cave to recoup. Mind you, my emotional and intellectual self wanted to continue to accomplish everything I desired, but my body had no more “get-up-and-go”, and honestly, it was the entry point into a very important life-long lesson for me.
I don’t know if it’s our culture, our upbringing, the corporate world, or all of the above, but it seems to me that I have always had this drive to be productive. Which is interesting because one of my very favorite things to do when I was a kid was read. For HOURS. While my brother and sister were outside playing during summers, I could be found in my bedroom reading for 4, 5, 6 hours at a time, lost in a world that let my imagination run wild and free. Probably one of the most relaxing things you can do besides a massage or a long nap.
So what happened? Where did I lose the ability to savor long weekend days on the couch writing poetry, listening to music, reading, or just staring out the window? Don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot of wonderful art, nature, and other exciting adventures to explore out in the world, and very cool people to share it with.
But working in the ol’ 9-to-5 for so many years seems to have created this default way of being in the world - which is not “being” at all, it’s all doing doing doing. Which doesn’t have to be all bad, if you have balance, which, apparently, I didn’t.
Fast forward to this summer, when I really started to feel the energy rising and I was ready to break free from the restraints of the last 2 years and get BUSY. There were social events, musical gigs, lots and lots of people to connect with. What a breath of fresh air - but for me, it’s like the fresh air forced into your face when gunning from 0 to 60 miles per hour. Wheeee!
Recently, I went on vacation in my beloved Black Hills of South Dakota and the intention was for me to slow down and enjoy the magical natural spaces of my home state. So, what did I do? I filled every single minute with hiking, biking, socializing, sightseeing, and more. Naturally. I felt really great, being out in nature and being active, and as soon as I got home, I hit the ground running with 2 major events to plan (both highly successful and rewarding), and with this new vacation inspiration and the energy of a Full Moon spurring me on, I decided it would be an excellent time to start running again for my exercise regimen. (Note to self: do not start anything new on a full moon without proper supervision!).
I went for a run/walk and felt pretty great - until the next day when I couldn’t walk.
Seems I was wearing shoes that were too old and hard orthotics that should have been long retired, and I inflicted upon myself some major tendonitis in both feet. Fabulous.
If you know me well, you know that I’m not a pleasant person when I am sick/ill or injured. I have too much to do, places to go, people to see!! I don’t have time to slow own!
How does the old saying go? “Heed the whispers of the body, before it starts to scream.” Well, my body screamed and yelled and I think I may have finally heard it. Of course, I had to throw my own temper tantrum in protest - I mean, why does it have to be that as I age I have to be more careful because I’m more prone to injury and soreness? Why can’t I be that young athlete forever?? Isn’t that the goal - to be fit, vital, and independent for as long as you can? This is SO unfair, menopause sucks, yada yada yada…
But here’s the interesting thing - or perhaps I should call it a gift - when you are injured, ill, or otherwise prevented from moving forward (physically or figuratively), it’s in that space of being immobile that the Spirit can move and speak freely within you. If I had to be honest, the signs had been there for a long time - that I was trying to do too many things, and adding more and more things to my plate, which created immense distraction and lack of focus. Which happens to be the perfect conditions for becoming ill and/or injured. And underneath that, in the quiet space that opens up when you quit resisting the rest that has been forced upon you, greater truths are revealed:
Your worth is absolutely independent of anything that you do or accomplish. You are worth simply because you exist.
Slowing down doesn’t mean you’ll miss out.
Rest is not laziness, and both are vitally important for healing and creativity.
To slow down doesn’t mean you have to let go of things that matter (although that may become apparent as a solution too), but it may just mean that you’re invited to become more intentional about what you are doing and how.
Rushing, hurrying, and multitasking is inversely proportional to productivity, success, and joy.
And perhaps most importantly, the oft-quoted, oft-needed reminder:
You are a human BEING, not a human DOING.
I have been consulting with my sister about my tendonitis and she has been super helpful with her knowledge of holistic and energy therapies, but perhaps her best piece of advice came as an admonition: “Your grounded for the entire week.” I’m glad someone had the guts to say it to me because apparently I’m not the disciplinarian in my life.
As I’m still sitting here, with my feet up on the couch, I am inviting you to join me in being “grounded” this week. If you’re needing some additional signs from the Universe, we have a New Moon in Libra and a Solar Eclipse on Wednesday. Let’s just say the energy is going to feel wonky and you are going to feel pretty tired. Libra is the sign of balance, and eclipses bring to light the shadows that keep us from living our best life. This new moon is all about shifting the scales of balance - get more rest, get “grounded”, let some of the things go on your “to do” list and replace it with a “to be” list. Reflect on where you need to have better boundaries between work and play, connection and solitude, and use the waning daylight as an invitation to slow down…and savor it, for once.
And when you do decide to get back out there with your badassery, please just make sure you are wearing the right shoes, for goodness sakes, and
Take
it
Slow.